But aside from being a personality indicator, long, shapely, polished nails hold an undeniable sexual connotation. They are a mark of beauty as well as a subconscious reminder of our primal selves. They are often referred to as claws or talons, and when describing their motions we use words such as slash, scratch, claw, or tear, terms obviously associated with animal behavior. When we see a woman with long fingernails, we think, What does she do with them? We wonder if they are sharp, and perhaps we imagine what it would be like to feel them scratching the back of our neck. Our thoughts may become progressively randier, as we imagine the way she might claw at our back or pinch our nipples between the tips of her red nails. Would she tickle us, tracing lazy circles over and over, or would she leave long, stinging tracks beaded with tiny drops of blood? Personally, I think that the best sex leaves a few battle scars, and I am turned on by those who look like they can give me some.

“Come on! What is all of this theorizing leading to, Ondine?” Well, my darling if impetuous reader, I will tell you now. When I began writing this piece, I obviously wanted to explore my reasons for fetishizing women’s fingernails. I quickly realized that I can’t put my finger on why I like them so much, and I don’t really care to. I possess a healthy intellectual curiosity, but do the social, biological, or psychological reasons behind my innocuous sexual turn-on really matter? Is it necessary to analyze my sexual proclivities on a porn site? Isn’t it enough to say that when I see a gorgeous woman with long, pointed nails, I want to strap her down and fuck her?

“Yes! It is!”